


rorrim

by lettersfortheinsane1



Category: Homestuck
Genre: F/F, F/M, Horror, M/M, disfigured characters, slight gore
Language: English
Status: In-Progress
Published: 2012-07-10
Updated: 2012-07-10
Packaged: 2017-11-09 13:18:27
Rating: Explicit
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings, Graphic Depictions Of Violence
Chapters: 1
Words: 3,095
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/455873
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/lettersfortheinsane1/pseuds/lettersfortheinsane1
Summary: <blockquote class="userstuff">
              <p>You watch him everyday. You hate him with a passion. It kills you inside, to know he is superior to you. But it will all change, because today is a very special day. Today is a day you can cause damage, along with a few friends of course.</p>
            </blockquote>





	rorrim

A young boy (well you think it’s a boy) stands before you in his room. Today is his 13th DAYBIRTH. What will be the name of this boy?

DEMENTED CHUCKLE FUCK.

WRONG.

Alright asshole, get for fucking real or I swear to god I will beat you with a fucking stick. Don’t test me, I will do it. Don’t. Fucking. Test me. Now try again you little fuck.

JONH EGTERB

Correct. You live this time fucker.

Your name is JONH EGTERB and today is your 13th DAYBIRTH. You are a MUTANT from…fuck you don’t even know. Are you even a mutant? Anyway you love PRANKS of the DANGEROUS kind, you absolutely DETEST cake to the GREATEST of lengths. But you don’t mind a little nibble if it had some body parts in them. You simply adore fucking with your ALPHA SELF named JOHN EGBERT. Like pulling your newest of pranks on him, such as fucking around with his time session and such like making shit move and freaking him the ever loving fuck out. But right now, you want to do more damage to this guy. You want to actually do HARM to this perfect son of a bitch just to get your jollies out of it because god damn you have never wanted to punch someone’s face in like this before. And the upsetting fact is that he looks like YOU…well…almost, you look like him just a really fucked up and freaky version of him. You look like some kind of fucked up zombie clown that was run over and this weird ass hat coming from your head. It’s been sewn on there so you don’t loose it or some shit. You don’t know, blame dad.

Now that introduction and such is over, now what?

= = > Get rid of the hat, it’s stupid.

Shut up! This hat is fucking awesome. And even if you did want to do that (which you don’t) it’s going to hurt like hell because that shit is sewn into your scalp. Not only that, this thing is so fucking special because your grandmother gave this to you before she passed. Well not exactly give it to you, more like give it to your dad and give it to you. You know what I mean.

= => Examine room?

No, no time for that.

= => Look in the trunk

You look at your FUN TRUNK with a little bit of interest, but you don’t really want to go in there, well at least not NOW.

= => Idiot, you forgot your things in there. GET THEM OUT!

Oh, fuck. You warily walk toward your FUN TRUNK and put a hand on the lid. Well, better now then ever.

= => Be greeted with a HOLY SHIT IS THAT A BLACK HOLE?

No, you retard, the thing is just spacious. This is your FUN TRUNK but in reality this shit ain’t fun at all. The only fun thing about it is when something awesome pops out and attack’s someone. But in the end, it always attacks you.

You quickly grab anything you can from out of there before your arm gets torn off from what the hell ever was in there.

= => Answer the birdie

Oh, he was the one trying to get a hold of you? You don’t know how well your friendship is with this guy, you feel like he’s fucking with you in some way or the other way around. Anyways, better answer him before he gets impatient.

 

Turntechcrowhead [TC] began terrorizing Frighteningprankster [FP]

TC: jonh answer me you little fuck  
TC: i swear to god if you don’t answer me right now i will fucking kill you  
TC: jonh i was kidding come on just answer me you lil  
TC: jonh im not playing around anymore  
FP: wow you are a needy little shit  
FP: i cant leave for a few hours to catch some rest before the big day  
FP: and here you are  
FP: blowing up my terror spot like a fucking mine field  
TC: fuck you now did you get the package  
FP: whoa at least get me dinner first honey  
TC: nah i would rather not waste my cash on you ya little nasty piece of trash  
FP: wow  
FP: rude  
FP: and no not the fuck yet not get off my dick  
TC: you have a dick  
FP: oh yeah so fucking funny  
FP: watch it or else ill turn you into roast chicken  
TC: oooo im so fucking scared  
TC: we all know who would wreck who so step down clown boy  
FP: make me you over grown feather duster  
TC: whoa  
TC: do not diss the feathers because these shits get the babes  
FP: and the dogs too right  
TC: shut up and go fuck yourself  
FP: woof woof huh ya lil whore  
TC: go look for the fucking package you little shit

Turntechcrowhead [TC] ceased terrorizing Fighteningprankster [FP]

 

= => Leave the room, get the package

 

Who the hell does he think he is? Best bro or not you don’t fucking pull a stunt like that and not expect everyone to remember that shit for a while. And he has the NERVE to get pissed off at you because you brought it up? Yeah, ok you wannabe cool douche.

You walk down the steps, checking to see if your dad is around. If not, then you are in the clearing. He showers you with unwanted affection and it pisses you off to the point you want to rip off his head. But if you did that then the fact that shit would go down and end up with your ass getting kicked is a very high chance.

You poke your head out the front door once you reach the living room. You are careful not to step in the remains of dead humans on your living room floor. God, you and dad are such messy eaters. Ah well, shit happens. You kick a spare head out the way and you go to the mail box. You swear, if the little bird shit is lying about the fact this game can help you transfer to your alternates and fuck shit up, you are going to ruffle his feathers so good he will never fucking forget it.

You pull out the package from the mail box, then stared at the dark sky. It has always been that way. You will never get sun. But you are ok with that shit cause because you are you and you can’t really change who you are. You head back into the house, trying so hard to avoid dad. Now you have to talk to…uhg…her.

= => Jonh: Pester your anan

He calls her nana, you call her anan. And honestly you shit bricks whenever she hits you up on your terror handle. She is your aunt, and heir to the Batter witch corp. And again, she and her friends fucking scare the ever loving SHIT out of you. She is not someone you want to fuck with, ha, nope, fuck that shit to hell and back.

You pull up your terror handle, again, and cautiously think about what you’re going to say to her so you can avoid her wrath.

Frighteningprankster [FP] began terrorizing Gluttonouscakebatter [GC]

FP: hey there  
GC: Finally.  
GC: So you decided to pick your self off the god damn ground and message me huh? Where in the fuck is that little item?  
FP: it should be there so don’t get all pissy  
GC: Excuse me?  
FP: nothing  
FP: just wait a little longer please!  
GC: Fine, just stop sniveling.  
FP: ok good  
GC: Also, jonh  
FP: yeah?  
GC: I can’t wait to fuck shit up.  
FP: well there is somethings we can agree on huh  
GC: Guess so

Frighteningprankster [FP] ceased terrorizing Gluttonouscakebatter [GC]

You relaxed. Well you dodged that bullet, well, that fork. You lean back in your chair, staring at the package next to your computer.

Should you open it now? She said to wait until she contacts you first. She probably doesn’t even know you have the package yet.

= => Jonh: Pass the time with him

Your cheeks heat’s up when the idea pops into your head. Well it’s been a while since you looked into his session, besides this will provide great research information for once you pass into his session. You click open a window and stare at the short little brunette. You guess it was night time for him because of the way he was asleep. A small smile creeps onto your face as you watched him sleep. Hey, this may sound creepy but its pretty much true. He was so much better then that other guy. Sure, they looked alike a little bit but it’s the way he treats people you know? And then there’s the other guy who treats you like trash. Maybe you can convince the others to spare him or something so you could keep him or something.

He is so cute, and so sweet. Sure, he yells a lot and orders everyone around but that’s what you really like in a guy. Someone to take charge and to not ignore you, unlike some red asshole you know of. And what pisses you off the most, your alternate refused his offer of mate ship! Well, you will fix that when you get to him.

You jolted when your terror handle alerted you of a new message.

Tentaclekittens [TK] began terrorizing Frighteningprankster [FP]

TK: Jonh?  
TK: Meow?  
TK: Meow, Jonh. Are you there meow?  
TK: Jonh, please tell me if you are there. I have my copy meow.  
TK: Jonh, meow.  
TK: Meow, meow, meow, meow.  
TK: MEOW!  
TK: Oh, sorry that was a loud one.  
TK: Jonh, are you there?  
TK: Are you doing something?  
TK: Meow, Jonh, are you doing what I think you are doing?  
TK: Jonh, we talked about this.  
TK: Jonh stop stalking the poor thing he already has enough nightmares.  
FP: reso shoosh  
TK: Ah, so you are playing the spy game with our new player are you not? You know he will surely be upset about this when he finds out.  
FP: he wont be angry because he wont find out  
FP: and i don’t care if hes going to be upset because i dont care about him  
TK: My, haven’t we moved on.  
TK: We can always talk about it Jonh.  
FP: oh my god please no  
FP: last time you spoke to me i ended up in the corner rethinking life for over two hours  
FP: not something i want to relive  
TK: I suppose you are right.  
TK: Well, shall we get on to the point of why I terrorized you in the first place?  
FP: i guess so  
TK: Alright then, meow.  
TK: It seems we have caught a little snag in our devious little plan.  
FP: and that would be?  
TK: It seems as if we will need a sacrifice to keep us stable in their world.  
FP: oh my god are you kidding me?  
TK: I am afraid not, meow.  
TK: It pains me to say this, but it is true. Their world is much more different then ours, we will need a medium as well as one life to keep us there, meow.  
TK: And it has to be from their world, not ours.  
TK: Meow.  
TK: Also, we will need something to allow us to cross.  
TK: Do you have anything that will be big enough to let us cross over the plains?  
TK: Meow, meow.  
FP: alright uhm  
FP: with the whole one life thing im sure we can figure something out  
FP: and im not sure  
FP: sorry reso  
TK: It is fine.  
TK: I will just ask my sister if she could find something, meow.  
FP: wow  
FP: you guys get along really great  
FP: im surprised actually with your violent nature  
TK: We manage, meow.  
TK: She has her fits and all but I love her dearly.  
TK: I will die for her, I truly will.  
FP: oh jeez  
FP: you are going to make me cry reso  
FP: haha  
FP: I have to respect you two for that  
FP: alright so how do I get this game started?  
TK: First, once you rip open the package there will be a talisman there meow.  
TK: After that, insert the disc and let it load, meow. I will insert my disc that will instantly connect to your game as soon as I put it in. Jeda and Deva will do the same. Heh, they would love that wouldn’t they meow.  
FP: heehee pretty much  
TK: I will place the alchemizer in your living room. Make a portable and mobile conversation device. And maybe a few weapons that you can easily hide. Humans are not exactly the brightest and will attack at the nearest thing that looks like a threat to them.  
FP: wow  
FP: rude but I don’t blame them  
FP: I mean look at us  
TK: Yes, that is true. Luckily our alternates are not in a large city. That would prove to be another issue for us, meow.  
FP: alright so do I just put the disc in now?  
TK: Yes, please do so.  
FP: alright its done  
TK: Good, I will be loading mine now and will connect to your session quickly. You will know we are halfway close to the game once we reach between the plains.  
FP: how will we know that?  
TK: We will know when we get there Jonh. Meow.  
FP: alright  
FP: hey reso  
TK: Yes, meow?  
FP: never mind  
FP: its uh  
FP: pretty dumb  
TK: Well, I am always there when you need me, meow.  
TK: Good luck, Jonh.  
FP: you too reso.

Frighteningprankster [FP] ceased terrorizing Tentaclekittens [TK]  
You logged off and picked up the package. Without hesitation you tear it open, a weird looking necklace plops into your lap along with a disc. You pick up the disc and place it into your computer and watched the little loading screen pop up and slowly loaded. Oh, someone’s terrorizing you.

Cancerouslydisturbed [CD] began terrorizing Frighteningprankster [FP]

CD: JONH.  
CD: JONH I KNOW YOU’RE THERE NOW ANSWER ME.  
CD: GOD DAMN IT PICK UP YOU LITTLE SHIT.  
FP: wow this is like the second time im being called a little shit  
FP: did you have a vote on my nick name or something?  
CD: FUCK FINALLY.  
CD: LOOK.  
CD: I JUST GOT MY COPY.  
CD: SOMEONE IS GOING TO CONNECT WITH ME NOW.  
CD: THE OTHERS ARE ALREADY THERE SO YOU SHOULDN’T ARIVE ON THE PLAINS ALONE.  
CD: DID YOU GET YOUR OWN COPY?  
CD: JONH?  
CD: JONH ARE YOU LISTENING?  
FP: im listening  
CD: WHAT IS YOUR FUCKING ISSUE?  
CD: I HAVE TERRORIZED YOU MORE THEN ONCE.  
CD: THIS IS THE FIRST FUCKING TIME IN MONTHS THAT YOU HAVE ANSWERED BACK, NOW WHAT IS THE GOD DAMN ISSUE. PLEASE.  
CD: FUCKING ENLIGHTEN ME.  
FP: if you dont know then im not even going to bother  
CD: WHAT DO YOU MEAN?  
FP: oh my god are you kidding me?  
CD: NO I AM NOT.  
FP: dude you are really getting on my nerves  
FP: you act as if you own me or something  
CD: WELL I AM OF THE SUPERIOR RACE JONH.  
FP: and this is the reason i avoid you  
FP: you get really annoying at times with the whole ‘superior race’ bull crap  
CD: WELL EXCUSE ME FOR STATING THE TRUTH.  
FP: uhg whatever just go connect with your game ill connect with mine  
FP: its almost done loading and I need to pack things  
CD: FINE, FINE.  
CD: JUST HURRY UP I DON’T FEEL LIKE WAITING FOR ANY OF YOU IDIOTS.

Cancerouslydisturbed [CD] ceased terrorizing Frighteningprankster [FP]

 

You roll your eyes as you log off to check on the loading screen again. You are now up to ninety percent, so it shouldn’t take long until Reso connects to you. Might as well wait, right?

 

= => Jonh: Be Rose.

You are now Rose Lalonde. And you are currently talking to a stranger on pesterchum And right now, this person is creeping you the fuck out.

Tentaclekittens [TK] began terrorizing Tentacletherapist [TT]

TK: Meow, meow.  
TT: And may I ask who are you?  
TK: Someone.  
TT: Yes, I guessed that. But what is your name?  
TT: Do I know you, how did you get my username?  
TK: I know all about you, Rosie dear.  
TK: I have to know of my enemy before I attack.  
TT: Enemy?  
TK: Yes, enemy.  
TK: Tell me. Do you feel,  
TK: Secure?  
TT: Well, you did rustle a few of my jimmies when you stated my name.  
TT: But I guess one of my friends put you up to this, just to scare me?  
TK: Ha, you dear little thing.  
TK: Tell me, do you believe in the supernatural?  
TT: I dabble in it, yes. I believe in some of it though.  
TT: Now. Who are you?  
TK: Heehee. Your killer, meow.  
TT: Excuse me?  
TK: The one who will put you six feet under, heehe. Meow~.  
TK: Rosie, Rosie, Rosie.  
TK: I had a cat named Rosie.  
TK: She died.  
TT: …  
TK: Want to know why?  
TT: I am afraid to ask.  
TK: Good.  
TK: She died because she felt a little bit too secure.  
TK: So I caught her off guard, and killed her.  
TK: That is a good way to teach someone, yes?  
TT: Sounds pretty gruesome.  
TK: It was. But it was her fault.  
TK: Life is never to secure, dear.  
TK: Always watch your back.  
TK: You have no idea who could be walking behind you.  
TK: Meow.  
TT: You sound quite,  
TT: Disturbed.  
TK: Oh, you have no idea.  
TK: I am disturbed in so many ways, it will frighten you if you could read my mind.  
TK: I am afraid I must go.  
TK: My companions are waiting for me.  
TK: I can not keep them waiting for much longer.  
TK: They are quite the impatient one’s.  
TK: Till we meet again, Rosie.  
TK: Which should be quite soon, meow.

Tentacle kittens [TK] ceased terrorizing Tentacletherapist [TT]

You watched as the user logged off. You are quite curious of who this person is. You wonder if it is just a friend playing a trick on you, or someone who may cause you and your friends harm. You believe it is the first, so you will have to speak to them about this later. But for now, you will rest.

**Author's Note:**

> how the hell do i put colors on the texts...?


End file.
